When we think of suffering, we almost always think about Job, the man in the Old Testament, who became synonymous with suffering.  Job went though some things a few centuries ago that we can identify with today.  Job started out sounding very spiritual, then he became more realistic and finally learned some lessons that can help us deal with the hard times we face.  I guess the foundational point is that everyone will face losses and everyone will respond to the losses.  The question is, “Do we know how to effectively deal with the losses?  If we are honest, most of us would have to admit that we do not know how to deal with major losses in a healthy way.  We get stuck in our grief and don’t know how to move beyond the loss.  Let’s take a look at how Job dealt with suffering.  

Briefly, here are four things I have learned from Job about suffering.

Bad things really do happen to good people.

Job was said to be “blameless and upright” and “he feared God and shunned evil.  (Job Chapter 1)  There couldn’t be a much better person than Job.

Some things we say may sound real good.

Job’s initial response to his massive losses was a very spiritual statement.  Of course, I can’t know his motives and inner thoughts, but I suspect from what we hear from Job later, that his first response was from a state of numbness.  Out of shock and numbness, we often say things that are almost automatic.

As our emotions begin to thaw out and the real feelings begin to emerge, we may be shocked at what we feel, think and say.  We may feel fear, anger, loneliness, deep sadness, pre-occupation, depression and pain to name a few of the feelings we may experience.

Friends can give bad advice.

Job’s friends came to help him sort out all this mess and comfort him in the time of loss.  Their motives were good and they really did want to help Job, but what happened was just the opposite.  Here is a quick summery of what they told Job.

• Bad people are the ones that suffer.  And to add more pain to that statement, the more evil you are the worse you will suffer.  The conclusion was that Job must be a really bad person to be suffering this much loss.  (Job 4:7)
• His friends attempt to shame him by saying, in effect, “I expected more from you.” (Job 4:1-6)  Job is told to live up to his sterling reputation.  That is supposed to help him though this tough time.  Spiritual people get this one because if you are spiritual you’re not supposed to feel the pain of loss and grief.  So some people unknowingly try to shame us into feeling better.
• Job was told to seek God for help (Job 5:8).  On the surface, asking a very spiritual man to seek God is absurd.  However, I think the message was deeper than that.  If only bad people suffer, then Job must have slipped into some really evil behavior just before this tragedy hit.  To his friends, there was no other way to explain what was happening.
• Chapter 5 of the Book of Job is all about his friends telling him, “If you had a loss like mine, you would know what to do.”  Human nature seems to dictate that we are the best authority on any given subject.  We operate from this principle: Since I have suffered, I know how to get through it, and if you do what I did you will too.

It would seem that when friends are at a loss for truly helpful words, they give bad advice.  In the beginning his friends just sat with Job in silence.  Perhaps that should have been the extent of the help they offered.  After all, it could have been the most helpful thing they could have done.

Life teaches lessons that are sometimes hidden in tragedy.

As much as we do not want to admit it, there can be good that comes out of tragedy.  Job’s life turned out to be blessed much more after his loss then before.  When we learn to look for the treasure in the garbage pile of grief and loss, we can grow and heal.

In the book, Exploring Spiritual Directions, Alan Jones sums up this final principle this way:  “…everything what has happened to us is a potential gift: our wounds, our disappointments, our idiosyncrasies, and our failures.  This is not to glorify pain and sorrow, but to affirm that such things can be transformed into a gift.”  God wants you to see the treasure in the midst of the hurt.  There is a journey to get to the treasure and God is patient to walk with you through the emerging emotions, no matter what they are.